Why Your Best Feedback Comes from Strangers

Discover why honest feedback for your manuscript is best sourced from strangers and learn how emotional distance sharpens constructive criticism and elevates your writing.

“What you seek is seeking you” - Rumi

Sita had poured her soul into her debut novel.

A hundred thousand words written in stolen moments—during commutes, after midnight, and while ignoring laundry. She handed the manuscript to her husband, Ravi, with an eager smile.

A week later, he slid it back across the table. "It’s perfect," he said, not meeting her eyes.

Ravi’s tone nagged at her. She took her best friend’s advice and asked Preeti, her co-worker, to recommend a beta reader. Preeti passed it on to her cousin, Rohan, a literature enthusiast Sita had never met.

Rohan emailed her three days later. The subject line read, "Your characters are unforgettable."

Her heart leapt as she opened the email, but it was filled with honest feedback. “Your protagonist is compelling, but her motivations feel unclear in chapters 4–6. The dialogue shines, but some subplots drag."

It stung, yes. But it also sparked ideas.

Sita spent the next month rewriting, polishing, and cutting.

When her book launched, the first review read: ‘A page-turner with depth. Sita crafts relatable characters with a razor-sharp narrative.’

Sita smiled. Rohan, a stranger, had been her toughest critic—and her greatest ally.

Why it matters?

One of the most critical steps in polishing your manuscript is gathering feedback.

But who you ask matters just as much as what they say. While it’s tempting to rely on close friends or family, their emotional ties can blur objectivity.

Instead, seeking an outsider’s perspective can provide the fresh, unfiltered insights your work needs to shine.

Deep down, you know the truth.

Honest, constructive feedback is NOT born out of love—it’s born out of objectivity.

When we ask family or friends for feedback, we often don’t hear the truth. Not because they don’t care, but because they care too much. Honesty can feel like a betrayal to those closest to us. Strangers, on the other hand, can be ruthlessly candid because they aren’t emotionally invested in your feelings.

Think about it: when was the last time your cousin criticized a politician or an actor? They probably didn’t mince words, did they? That’s the kind of truth your manuscript deserves.

Practical Tip

Ask a friend, family member or colleague to pass your work along to someone who doesn’t know you personally. Join writing groups, online communities, or beta reading networks - on sites like Reddit, Grapevine, Facebook, Quora. Not only will you get fresh perspectives, but you’ll also build your confidence in presenting your work to an unfamiliar audience.

So, next time Aunt Sheila raves about your "amazing" manuscript, smile, thank her, and promptly send it to her book club’s brutally honest member. Your manuscript will thank you—and so will your readers.

Gentle reminder:

I’m working on a beginner-friendly course in English on publishing books with Amazon KDP, and I’d love your input to make it truly valuable!

If you’re interested in learning more about self-publishing or have ideas on what a KDP course should include, could you take a minute to fill out this quick survey?

Your feedback will help shape the content, and as a thank-you, you’ll receive a discount code for the course when it’s launched! 🎉

Take the survey here: https://tally.so/r/mJkr4R

(If you have already taken this survey, then please ignore this note)